Filed under: things that make me happy. 😊 #arizona #masonjar #curlywurlystraw
I seriously can’t take this shit anymore. Yes, this is my fault. This is my fault for giving someone the benefit of a doubt and a chance to prove himself wrong so blame me because I was this stupid girl who had fallen inlove with a sweet talker and a fucking playboy. But damn, why do I always get the blame here? Don’t you think that no one will fall inlove in the first place if someone did not give a motive to her? Don’t you think that he in the first place should know his boundaries and the FINE LINE between friendship and love? He in the first place should not have stepped into that line because maybe no one would fall if no one gave her the reason to. THINK ABOUT THAT.
You say you care,
Well fuck you.
I used to believe in everyone and everything.
Now their words are transparent and lies seem to spill from every inch of every word that falls from their so called loving tongues.
I thought they were different,
That they actually cared.
But then again, I…
I would like to watch you sleeping,
which may not happen.
I would like to watch you,
sleeping. I would like to sleep
with you, to enter
your sleep as its smooth dark wave
slides over my head
and walk with you through that lucent
wavering forest of bluegreen leaves
with its watery sun & three moons
towards the cave where you must descend,
towards your worst fear
I would like to give you the silver
branch, the small white flower, the one
word that will protect you
from the grief at the center
of your dream, from the grief
at the center. I would like to follow
you up the long stairway
again & become
the boat that would row you back
carefully, a flame
in two cupped hands
to where your body lies
beside me, and you enter
it as easily as breathing in
I would like to be the air
that inhabits you for a moment
only. I would like to be that unnoticed
and that necessary.
|—||Margaret Atwood, Variations on the Word Sleep (via spiritsintheclocktower)|
Sometimes i feel as though i’m invincible. Like I couldn’t care any less but then that moment comes when I see your face and i feel like i’m broken to pieces once again. Like Multiple Sclerosis. Relapsing and remitting. Secondary progressive. All those times I did just to put myself together, gone in a heartbeat. I wish I could erase all the memories in my head. To set fire to them and just remember the glowing embers. Beautiful but dangerous. A fragment that was real but as you go along you tell yourself it’s just a figment of your imagination. But not quite.
|—||Just Listen - Sarah Dessen (via maziebalbuena)|
I buy all your favorite foods so I will be ready when you come home
because once I did this and you said “This is how I know you love
I go on long walks alone and think about a poem my friend wrote
that goes ”This is how you die by distance.”
I hum the sound of the dial tone under my breath.
I stare at my hands and wonder at their uses. I consider pawning
my thighs. I consider auctioning off my hip bones. I put my breasts in
a box on the top shelf of the closet. I do not need them now.
I think of all the things I have to tell you when I will see you.
I just found out pumpkins are technically fruits
Cary Grant’s first job was in a traveling circus
Most mammals are born able to walk and learn to run within minutes, so we are not crazy for moving so fast.
This morning I wrote your name in the steam on my mirror, even though I knew it would fade within minutes
In my best notebook I wrote “I miss you” ten thousand times.
I wrote “I think I am missing one of my ribs”
I wrote “I envy the way leaves know exactly when to fall from the branches and when to come back in the spring”
I wrote “Everyone else isn’t you. It turns out that’s a huge problem for me.”
Your body is made of the same elements that lionesses are built from. Three quarters of you is the same kind of water that beats rocks to rubble, wears stones away. Your DNA translates into the same twenty amino acids that wolf genes code for. When you look in the mirror and feel weak, remember, the air you breathe in fuels forest fires capable of destroying everything they touch. On the days you feel ugly, remember: diamonds are only carbon. You are so much more.
When I think about you, I moonshine.
I howl quiet. Backtrack, breadcrumbs, bird pecked.
When I think about you I drawl. I crawl as if shot
square in the pelvic bone, quarts of red, arterial
exit wound messing,. I emerald your sapphine.
Think of the ring I shoplifted from Bryant Park, broke
|—||Eleonor and Park by Rainbow Rowell (via saranghaeneyaj)|